Compromise is balance. Compromise is tending to each others needs. Many couples have problems because one either refuses to compromise with the other or give up too much and end up upset and unsatisfied. The key to a lasting relationship is balance and to achieve balance, c0mpromise must be made between couples.

What is compromise?

com⋅pro⋅mise [kom-pruh-mahyz], noun, verb:
a settlement of differences by mutual concessions; an agreement reached by adjustment of conflicting or opposing claims, principles, etc., by reciprocal modification of demands

In English, it means when two people stop being little shits and reach a middle ground for the overall benefit for both. It doesn’t have to be a literal object all the time, but can also pertain to pretty much everything such as certain habits, hobbies, or other lifestyle choices. A compromise is usually made when one party brings up an issue with another one and if deemed reasonable, they both agree to adjust things. Sometimes, a compromise can be a sacrifice. Other times, however, it can be something that should have been changed in the first place.

Why is it necessary?

Compromising is the difference between a healthy, stable relationship and one that ends relatively quickly. Relationships require effort and tender care from both involved and as such, requires that both parties are satisfied for things to go smoothly. Many pointless fights happen because of stupid things like conflicting TV show schedules or what to have for dinner that become seeds for bigger conflicts in the future.

Simply put, everybody wants to have a peaceful relationship that’s as conflict free as possible. In order for that to happen, both of you have to be relatively happy and satisfied.

Thinking objectively

Men tend to be very hubristic creatures. I admit it, I always think that I’m Mr. Right. And even though I’m right most of the time, there are times when I’m really wrong.

Compromise teaches you to look at things objectively. We don’t realize it, but we can be very biased about things. We don’t give things a chance, or have our minds firm about something simply because “I know I’m right.” How many times have you felt that way about something? How many times have you been wrong?

One time, my girl and I went to see a movie. There was a movie she wanted to see badly but I wouldn’t watch it unless you dragged my dead body to the showing. I already made up my mind about it sucking and had another one in mind. My psychic powers with zero scientific basis told me it was supposed to suck. Nevertheless, I grit my teeth and went in anyways in order to avoid her bitching all night.

Ironically, I really enjoyed it and was kind of glad that I saw this movie instead of the other one.

Learn to give things up

You need to give to get. It’s the law this universe has been run by since the dawn of time and it’s worked out well so far. If you expect anything from your girl, you need to be ready to make some sacrifices.

Sometimes, they can be tough to do. Maybe you have a lifestyle choice that absolutely must be changed. You may feel that it’s fine for you but isn’t suitable for the relationship. Things like curbing your smoking/drinking habits, becoming more neat & tidy and such can be extremely tough for those who are well used to that kind of lifestyle.

Other times, they aren’t even serious. Is cleaning the dishes some days really that much to ask? Is something so simple worth getting into a fight over?

Some of things, however, must be changed not for the relationship, but for you as a person. As I mentioned, if you have serious alcohol related problems, not only will it strain your relationship but it’ll take you down to a spiral of suck. She shouldn’t even have to ask you to change such life threatening things.

..But have some self-respect. Don’t give up everything.

A line has to be drawn somewhere. Just because you’re listening to some of her demands doesn’t mean you must bow down to all of them. Don’t be a pushover. If you feel strongly about something, talk it out with her. Just as you shouldn’t dictate her life and her choices, she has no right to do the same to you.

I know for sure there are some things I will never give up no matter what’s at stake. At times, things just become a core part of you and make up your overall personality.

Balance

Remember, compromise is a balance. The scale should never sway one way but sit comfortably in the middle. One sided relationships arise from a person giving up too much for another person which usually turn out horribly. You must tend to your partners needs but in turn she has to return it as well. Don’t think of it as something reserved for big decisions but something you must deal with on a minute basis.You don’t realize it but compromise is being met daily between you and your partner.

This is one thing we all fear the most. Nothing hurts our hearts (and our pride) when girls cheat on us. It’s fucked up, and it’s totally unnecessary. We aren’t always in the receiving end though as guys cheat as well. Regardless of who does it, it’s still a really fucked up thing to do. We might not agree on whether or not it’s okay to cheat, but one thing that we can agree on is that it’s meaning is different for everyone. What exactly is cheating?

Cheating is..

Cheating, to me, constitutes action. If I’m with a girl, and she thought about some other guy, I’d hate it and break up with her because she just isn’t into me. However, if she acted on her thoughts, then it’s time to add that whore to the wall of shame.

Not just thinking..

What do I mean by “acting” on it? Action. If she touched another guy sexually or held his hands intimately, it’s cheating. Does it sound extreme? Yes. Most people draw the line at kissing, but think about it: if your girl is caressing another dude’s chest, or has her fingers on his lips, or even grabs his junk, would you be okay with that? They sure as hell weren’t kissing, but they sure as hell aren’t regular friends either. I’m sure you would flip a couple of shits.

That goes for dudes as well. There isn’t a double standard. You do the same thing above (sucks for you if your girl has a junk) and I’ll take you to court and testify against you. You’re definitely cheating, bro.

What’s NOT cheating..

Having said all that, I don’t believe thinking about somebody else or finding someone else attractive is cheating. Bricks are shat when girls find out that you find their friend cute or when you check out other girls. Guys get upset just like that as well. Imagine your girl was talking to the hunky personal trainer at the gym and she was telling him about you; you’d probably want her to just shut up about him.

Bottom line is that there’s a lot of things girls (or even guys) don’t like to hear, but that doesn’t mean anything was going on. It’s also a sign of insecurity on both sides, something that should really be worked on. Like I said, I believe cheating starts at action, regardless of how small. We all think of stupid ideas or have certain fantasies here and there, but as long as you (or they) don’t really act on it, then it’s fair game. Yeah, it sucks but deal with it.

Don’t do it. Ever.

Don’t cheat because you don’t want to be cheated on. It hurts like a bitch, and it only brings pain and suffering. Real men don’t cheat. That only shows that you’re too pussy to either make a commitment or weren’t man enough to break up with her when you should have. Have you gotten cheated on? Fuck her, she’ll get what’s coming. Worry about making yourself a better person. Eye for an eye doesn’t solve anything nor does it make anybody happy.

What do you consider cheating?