Jul 23, 2009
Compliment well and effectively and this’ll be you in no time.
We all know that girls care the most about, well, themselves. They like to hear how good they look, how funny they are, how much you’re attracted to them and so forth. They are also tired of hearing the same shit over and over again. They know they’re beautiful. They know they have nice eyes.
They look at the mirror 57453 times during the day so they’re quite aware of these mindblowing observations you’re making. I’m not saying you shouldn’t compliment them anymore. I’m telling you that if you want to get their attention quickly and really get them hooked, learn to compliment effectively.
What you would normally say.
“You’re really pretty you know that?”
“I really love your eyes.”
Ew. What the fuck are you saying, man? You know what you sound like? Every horny motherfucker she’s met in her life that’s trying to get in her pants. If this didn’t work for them, what makes you think you’re a special case? By now, she’s so sick of hearing that, no matter how great a guy you might be, she’ll just write you off as just more of the same.
“But shouldn’t I compliment girls? I thought this was very important!”
It’s very important actually. They like to be flattered, regardless of how much they say they don’t care. How can you compliment effectively and not like every other dude? You have to be subtle. You have to be subtle in your delivery and the content of the compliment.
Being subtle requires detective work. You have to be very attentive to her; to what she says, what she looks like, what she’s wearing, etc. Observe carefully and find nice qualities about her.
When you compliment her, say something nice about her that she’ll never expect anybody but herself to be aware about. It throws them off balance and makes her ask “Whoa, who is this guy?”
She’ll never expect it.
When I’m on dates, I compliment a lot, but extremely subtly. I pay attention to everything about a girl–her hairstyle, her clothes, her make up, the kind of nail polish she’s wearing, what kind of shoes she’s wearing, her mannerisms, the kind of jewelry she’s wearing, the things she says, everything. This gives me ample ammunition to say some really nice things about her.
For example, I would say things like:
“You know, it’s pretty cool how your nail polish matches your shirt.”
“It’s really cute how you always look up when you say something exciting.”
“Do you use X Brand of lotion? Your hands smell great.”
Did you see the difference? When I compliment, it’s targeted at something about her. It’s not general bullshit. It’s stuff she doesn’t expect you to know or care about. It wasn’t IN YOUR FACE and I didn’t say things totally bluntly. Instead, I noticed things about her and I managed to tell her that she’s got a great sense of style, has cute mannerisms and is well groomed without ever saying it outright. That’s what I mean by being subtle. It’s works like magic for me and a lot of times has turned someone that was “just a friend” into my next hot date. It’s also drove my dates into potential girlfriend territory.
Room for expansion!
When you get good at this, you can also throw in a tease and get more opportunities to further things. For example, me telling her about her hands smelling nice not only let’s me compliment her, but I can then proceed to touch her hands (since we’re on the subject!) and then further compliment her by saying something about her hands being soft and pleasant to hold. You got her comfortable and you got her feeling good about herself without sounding desperate or like a creep, and she allowed you to touch her. It’s practically set.
Complimenting subtly and effectively will help you get closer to girls quite easily. Remember, you can’t only compliment her during the conversation. Throw in some tease, make her laugh, and keep her interested. Just remember to sprinkle in the compliments throughout and you’ll have her hooked.
Is there still room for the classic compliments?
Absolutely. However, I’d advise to save them until she is a lot more comfortable with you, perhaps on your third or fourth date.